Thursday, July 31, 2008

Full Solar Eclipse / Rosh Chodesh Av 5768 - THE LION ROARS!

Erev Rosh Chodesh Av 5768 - Friday August 1st 2008
Full Solar Eclipse at 9 degrees / 31 minutes (10 Degrees) Leo – 13:13 Jerusalem (1:13pm)
Mincha Gedolah (Jerusalem) – 13:19 (1:19 pm)
Candle Lighting: 6:56pm / Shekiah 7:36


According to The Book of Formation (Sefer Yetzirah), each month of the Hebrew year has a letter of the Hebrew alphabet, a zodiac sign, one of the twelve tribes of Israel, a sense, and a controlling limb of the body that correspond to it.
The Hebrew month of Av (or Menachem-Av, the consoler of Av) is the fifth of the twelve months of the Jewish calendar.
The name Av literally means "father." It derives from the root which means "to will" or "to desire."
It is the month of the "low point" of the Jewish calendar (the 9th of Av, the day of the sin of the spies and the destruction of both the first and second Temples in Jerusalem) as well as the month of the "high point" of the Jewish calender (the 15th of Av--"there are no happier days for Israel than the 15th of Av and Yom HaKippurim" (Mishnah Ta'anit 26:)--the day of finding one's predestined soul-mate).
This accords with the teaching of our sages that "the Mashiach is born on the 9th of Av." Relative to all other souls of Israel, the soul of Mashiach, who comes to redeem Israel from her state of (spiritual as well as physical) exile, is like a groom to his bride. After his birth on the 9th of Av he reveals himself to his bride and betroths her on the 15th of Av.

Letter: TET
The letter tet, which resembles a womb, equals 9, corresponding to the 9 months of pregnancy. In the month of Av the 9 months are condensed and concentrated into 9 days, from Rosh Chodesh Av (the yahrtzeit of Aaron the high priest, whose name comes from the word "pregnant") to the 9th of Av, the day, which as mentioned above is the birthday of Mashiach.

Zodiac Sign (mazal): Leo - Aryeh
The aryeh symbolizes the superrational power of Divine will (the meaning of the name Av, as mentioned above). The initial manifestation of G-d's will to destroy (the Temple) was in truth purely for the sake of reconstructing (the Temple with all of its spiritual meaning and significance for Israel and the entire world) for eternity.

In the words of our sages (Yalkut Shimoni, Yermiyahu, 259 ): "The lion [Nevudchanetzar, who is referred to in the Bible as a lion--Yermiyahu 4:7] came on the month of the lion [Av] and destroyed the lion [the Temple, which is referred to in the Bible, especially with regard to the alter, as a lion], in order that the lion [G-d, of Whom is said 'the lion roars, who shall not fear'--Amos 3:8] come on the month of the lion and rebuild the lion."

This secret is also reflected in the numerical value of aryeh. Aryeh in gematria = 216 = gevurah ("might"). Gevurah is the Divine power responsible for tzimtzum (contraction and diminution of Divine light and energy, as is said with regard to the beginning of Av: "When Av enters we diminish in joy" [Mishnah Ta'anit 26:]) and destruction. But 216 = 3 ? 72. 72 = chesed ("lovingkindness"), the Divine power which "builds" all of reality, as is said (Psalms 89:3): "the world is built with [by the power of] chesed." Three times chesed corresponds to the building of all three Temples, who are all contained and find their eternal consummation in the third Temple, to be built speedily in our days by Mashiach. For this reason the aryeh appears to the right, in the place of chesed, in the Divine Chariot (Ezekiel 1:10).

Tribe of Israel: Shimon
Simon was one of the strongest tribes during the wandering in the desert but later became one of the weakest in consequence of losses suffered during the battles for the Promised Land. It was eventually absorbed by mighty Judah. Formerly the city of Shechem was situated within the boundaries of Simon and the gate of the city therefore appears on the tribe's. The biblical phrase on the tab is from Deut. 33:5, "...and the tribes of Israel were gathered together."

The name Shimon comes from the word "to hear." The sin of the spies on the 9th of Av entailed their speaking evil of the land of Israel and the people's accepting--"hearing"--the evil tongue. Thus the general rectification of the month of Av is the rectification of hearing.

Shimon is the only tribe that Moses did not explicitly bless at the end of the Torah. This was due to his "frustration" with the tribe of Shimon because of their involvement (more than all the other tribes) in the sin of Pe'or (prostitution with foreign women, which resulted in idolatry). The name Shimon divides into two words which spell sham avon, "there is iniquity."
In a certain sense, Moses (from the tribe of Levi) was most closely related (in spirit) to Shimon than to any other tribe. "Shimon and Levi are brothers" (Genesis 49:5) said our father Jacob in blessing his sons. The two together (Shimon leading his younger brother Levi) took revenge for the rape of their sister Dinah, and destroyed the entire city of Shechem.

In Kabbalah we are taught that the primary reincarnation of Moses is in Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, he who more than any other of the sages revealed the inner dimension of the Torah of Moses (in the Holy Zohar).

The "degeneration" of the power of Shimon leads to the destruction of the Temple. The rectification and elevation of that very power brings about the eternal reconstruction of the Temple.

The rectification of Shimon (the rectification of the sins and iniquities of Israel which brought to the destruction of the Temple in the month of Av, the month of Shimon) is by his clinging to the most essential attribute of Moses--humility. The word avon ("sin") permutes to spell anav ("humble") the unique term by which the Torah praises Moses (Numbers 12:3): "And the man Moses was very humble [anav], more than any other man on the face of the earth." The name Shimon transforms (in the month of Av) from "there is iniquity" (sham avon) to "there is the humble one" (sham anav).

The ability of Shimon to so "metamorphasize" depends upon his inner sense of hearing. Moses addresses Israel with the most all-inclusive statement of the Torah (Deuteronomy 6:4) : "Hear [shemah] O' Israel...." Moses speaks to Israel through the soul-root of Shimon. Inner hearing (derher in Yiddish) comes with the deep sense of humility in the soul.

Even though Moses did not explicitly bless Shimon, our sages teach us that he alluded to him in the first word of his blessing to Judah (Deuteronomy 33:7): "Hear [shemah] G-d the voice of Judah...." (This phrase complements the verse "Hear O' Israel..."; in gematria, "Hear G-d the voice of Judah" = 602 = 7 ? 86 [Elokim, G-d], "Hear O' Israel..." = 1118 = 13 ? 86).
In the division of the land of Israel to the twelve tribes, Shimon inherited his portion within the larger portion of Judah (this is the only instance that one tribe inherited its portion within another). When the two names Shimon and Judah are added together: 466 plus 30 = 496 = malchut ("kingdom") Thus we learn that the malchut of Judah depends upon the "presence" and "partnership" of Shimon.

Judah corresponds to the month of Nissan and the sense of speech. Shimon corresponds to the month of Av (the first two letters and "sub-root" in Hebrew of the word aviv, the name in Torah for the month of Nissan) and the sense of hearing. Av is the 5th month from Nissan, whose letter is hei = 5.

The two senses of speaking and hearing are obviously a pair, just as in the sin of the people's hearing (accepting) the "evil tongue" spoken by the spies, the sin of the 9th of Av. Thus we conclude that the power of the month of Av (the month of [apparent] destruction) is to "hear" the message "spoken" by the month of Nissan (the month of redemption), and integrate the first and foremost power of Israel'sleadershipi nto the consciousness of the Jewish people.

This is the secret of the "pregnancy" and "birth" of Mashiach (the quintessential leader of Israel) from the 1st of Av (the beginning of his 9 day pregnancy) to the 9th of Av (his birth). He then fully unites with the consciousness of the people, "in matrimony," on the 15th of Av.

Sense: Hearing
"To hear" in Hebrew means "to understand," to fully integrate into one's consciousness (into one's heart, not only to understand intellectually in one's mind). To hear another is to fully understand his dilemma and emphasize with him. Hearing is receiving--kabbalah (first revealed by Rabbi Shimeon Bar Yochai).

In the beginning of Isaiah (read on the Shabbat before the 9th of Av), it says: "if you desire [tovu , from the word Av] and hear [the sense of Av], you shall partake of the goodness of the land."

The sense of hearing is the sense of inner balance, the foundation of rectified existence. (Imbalance is the source of all fall and destruction). A well balanced ear, a well oriented sense of hearing, possesses the ability to discern and distinguish in everything one hears truth from falseness, as is said (Job 12:11 and 34:3): "the ear discerns words" ozen malin tivchan (the initial letters of this phrase spell emet--"truth").

Controlling Limb: Left Kidney
The "advice" given by the left kidney is how to properly hear and integrate truth into one's consciousness.
In accordance with the general principle that "right" is always more spiritual than "left," the sense of thought (of the month of Iyar), controlled by the right kidney, is relatively more spiritual than the sense of hearing, controlled by the left kidney.
The two kidneys are the "male" and "female" advisors of the soul. The right kidney advises how to rectify one's character traits through the process of careful introspection (the sense of thought of the month of Iyar). The left kidney advises how to absorb truth into one's consciousness (the sense of hearing of the month of Av)

The word for kidney, kulyah, comes from kol--"all." Kol = 50. Our sages teach us that "at the age of 50 one is able to give advice." The two kidneys are two complementary sets of 50 (as the 50 parallel 50 loops of the two sets of the over-hang drapery of the Tabernacle). 50 plus 50 = 100 = 10 squared, the consummate state of rectification, 10 (powers of the soul) "interincluded" in 10.

Menachem Av
To the name of the fifth month of the Jewish year (according to the Jewish calendar, the months are counted from Nissan) -- Chodesh Av - - it is customary to add the name Menachem ("comforter," "consoler"; the name of Mashiach) -- Menachem Av.

Though in the scroll of Lamentations, that we read on Tisha b'Av, the day of the destruction of both the first and second Temples, we find: ein la menachem, "she has no consoler," the name of the month, which reflects its deepest essence, states that, in truth, there is a consoler, though in time of exile, he remains concealed.

The Ba'al Shem Tov teaches us that whenever the Hebrew word ein (spelled: alef, yud, nun), whose literal meaning is "no," appears in the Torah text, by changing its vowels to read ayin, the implied negation becomes transformed into a positive assertion. Ayin means "nothing," referring in Kabbalah to the Divine nothing from which all reality -- something -- is continuously recreated. The consciousness of ayin is identified by the Ba'al Shem Tov to be the source of the Jewish soul (based upon the rabbinic phrase, ein mazal l'yisrael, "Israel is under no astrological sign," which he reads ayin mazal l'yisrael, "the Divine nothing is the soul-source of Israel").

Thus, the above phrase from Lamentations, ein la menachem, may be read ayin la menachem, "the Divine nothing, the soul-source of Israel, is her consoler." In fact, the two words ein mazal, (read ayin mazal, as above), equal numerically the name Menachem (138).

Our sages teach us that from the outset of the month of Av, we are to "diminish" (mishenichnas Av, mema'atim...). This is the time to reach our soul-root of ayin, Divine nothingness, from which emanates our true, eternal consolation.

Av means "father." In Chassidut we are taught that just as our Father in heaven consoles us (as we read in the beginning of the haftorah of the Shabbat following Tisha b'Av: nachamu nachamu ami, yomar elokeichem, "Comfort, comfort My people, says your G-d"), so are we to console our Father in heaven (especially during the first nine days of Av), for, "woe to the Father who has exiled His children from His table" (Talmud, Berachot). We comfort Him by assuring Him that even in the darkest moments of our exile we retain perfect faith and trust in Him, that ultimately, all is for the good (though often we are unable to fathom this) and that our true and complete redemption is imminent.

The word Av is constructed of the first two letters of the Hebrew alphabet: alef, beit, which stand for (are the initial letters of) the two words emunah and bitachon, "faith" and "trust." In order to reach the initial alef and its subsequent beit, we ourselves, must return to our original alef, the Divine nothingness of our soul-root, as explained above.

May we merit this year to see our holy Temple rebuilt and standing eternally on the Temple Mount in Jerusalem, with the coming of Mashiach, of whom it says, hinei zeh ba, "behold, he has come." The Hebrew word ba ("has come" or "is coming"; spelled: beit, alef) is actually the inversion of the word Av (spelled: alef, beit). The Mashiach's coming is Menachem Av. Amen.

The material contained in this blog entry has been prepared by gal einai institute, a United States non-profit organization dedicated to disseminating and implementing the inner wisdom of the Torah--Kabbalah and Chassidut--as taken from the teachings of rabbi yitzchak ginsburgh©5760-5765 (2000-2005) by Gal Einai Institute, All rights reserved

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Barak Obama's Bar Mitzvah in Israel!

Whoever coached BARAK OBAMA on what to wear to his upcoming BAR MITZVAH at the Kotel should be congratulated. White silk kippah, blue and white striped tie, dark blue suit - he's picture-perfect for the big event!
Not only does he already have a Hebrew name ("Barak" means "lightning" in Hebrew and comes from the same root as the word "Baruch" which means "blessing," and was the name of one of the Judges in pre-Davidic Israel) but the Torah Portion he is scheduled to recite this week, Parshas Mattos, recounts how Moses gave the tribes of Gad, Reuven and half the tribe of Manasseh land on the East Side of the Jordan river as their inheritance (Numbers 32:33).

Be certain that when the Bar Mitzvah boy recites those verses the liberal press will be forced to shock the world with such headlines as: "Obama Advocates Expansion of Israeli Land into Jordanian Territory," while supposedly conservative media such as Fox News will probably spin it as "Obama Flip-Flops on Middle East Borders".
This unfortunate misrepresentation of Barak's Bar Mitzvah Parsha needs to be rectified before it gets out of hand. But don't look to the text of his Haftarah reading - Jeremiah 1:1-2:3, which contains the military deployment of pan-Euro / Islamic troops against Israel (1:14-15). The press will NOT know what to make of that!

Also pictured, being helped with the cantillation marks and vowels of his Torah text, Barak Obama with Ehud Barak, Defense Minister of Israel. For once, Ehud wasn't being DEFENSIVE, he was downright tickled to be able to help his Name-Twin - yes, BARAK! - ensure his pronunciation was Litvish-perfect, "just like we'd read it at The Meir," Barak was overheard saying. Which Barak? Oy, such a nachas-fest it was, this reporter can't even tell them apart!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Palestinian Baker Creates Obama Bagel - Cherry Tomatoes and Mint???

The Jerusalem Post reports today reports that Palestinian baker Nasir Abdul Hadi "is so grateful Barack Obama is making time to visit the West Bank that he has named a bagel after him."
When Barak Hussain Obama, the all-but- anointed Democratic nominee for US president visits Ramallah on Wednesday, he will be able to see The Obama bagel - baked with cherry tomatoes and mint - on display at Abdel Hadi's bakery in downtown Ramallah.
Which begs two questions... one: why cherry tomatoes and mint? Two: if John McCain was a bagel, what flavor would he be?

Monday, July 21, 2008

Life Begins at 88

In the "Thank G_d It's Never Too Late" Department...
88 Year-old France Greenberg of Pittsburg, PA is making Aliyah to Israel with the Nefesh b'Nefesh organization, only 59 short years after being turned away from our shores by the British as part of the infamous Exodus Ship episode.
After surviving the Holocaust, post-war refugee detention camps and the loss of her entire family, Mrs. Greenberg found herself on the Exodus, which was torpedoed and tear-gassed by British Mandate forces and sent back to Europe.
Mazel Tov and Welcome Home, Mrs. Greenberg!
Details of Mrs. France Greenburg's story can be found on Israel National News at :

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Your Sky

This is what the sky above Jerusalem looks like on Your Sky, an amazing website that allows you to map the sky above no matter where you are. Don't ask me how they do it, they're Swiss. Your Sky's URL is :
A little something to bring a little persepective about how little we are in the grand scheme of things.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Samir Kuntar and Gomez Adams: Separated at Birth?

What does child-killing terrorist Samir Kuntar and deeply demented Adams Family patriarch Gomez Adams have in common? A mere glance at the two of them, side by side, confirms the theory that perhaps these two gleeful ghouls were, in fact SEPARATED AT BIRTH!
The tragic phemonenon of being separated at birth affords lay socioligists the opportunity to opine as to whether "nature vs. nurture" is dominant in our DNA. Obviously Gomez Adams turned out far more well-adjusted than his unfortunate brother. Gomez was raised by witches, warlocks, ghosts and various members of the "undead" while Samir was raised by Moslem parents in Lebanon. Clearly Gomez got a better deal.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Stop Blaming Jewish Mothers!

Certain members of the Israeli Government has recently taken to invoking our sacred tribal icon, The Jewish Mother, in a desperate attempt to justify their foolish, dangerously suicidal decisions.
National Religious Party chairman and Knesset Member Zevulun Orlev said upon hearing the Shalit family was petitioning Israel's High Court to block the recent tahadiyeh (Arabic for a temporary ceasefire) with terrorists in Gaza: "Today every Jewish mother knows that the government of Israel has abandoned Gilad Shalit to his fate as part of a false 'calm."
Speaking of the deal to exchange a live murderer for the bodies of two murdered Israeli soldiers, Orlev said: "The approval of the deal transmits an important message, that every Jewish mother will know that the State of Israel will never abandon its soldiers...even if the government failed in its management and even if there were justified and weighty reasons to oppose the deal, now, once the decision has been made, we must line up behind it, put aside all of the arguments and embrace the families of the hostages."
Wait a minute mister...I'm a Jewish Mother and I don't see the logic of your using my heart and soul - which is the heart and soul of the Jewish People itself - to justify excusing the Israeli Government's ineptitude, cowardice and shameful double-dealing which has resulted in the return of hundreds of vicious murderers and high-profile convicted terrorists being released back into the open arms of Arab politicians and world media hailing them as heroes in exchange for the remains of two of our boys who we knew with certainty were in fact dead.
The kidnapped Israeli soldier who has become our collective son, Gilad Shalit (who in fact may actually still be alive, G_d willing), has been tossed around like a hot potato between Hamas, Hezbollah, Fatah, Egypt, Islamic Jihad, Al Aska Matyrs Brigade, and all the rest of the home-grown garage band-like gangs that roam our hood with arms bought and paid for with American tax dollars (hello, is anyone listening???).
Two questions: 1) Anyone remember Entebbe? 2) Don't we have a time-release poison we can put into the terrorist's food before their release that will kill them within 72-96 hours?
Please, please wake up and smell the challah baking. Yes we go to the ends of the Earth to rescue and retrieve our soldiers. Let's do that again instead of ensuring that more soldiers - and probably civilians as well - will be kidnapped in the future.
Consider this an official "cease and desist" warning: cease and desist from referring to Jewish Mothers when speaking about your own lack of will, morals and in general, beytsim. We didn't cut them off, you did that yourselves with a fountain pen when you signed the Oslo Agreement and every subsequent "peace" deal from then until now.
Now go to your room and think about it before dinner.

What's Going On???

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

"It's The Degradation, Stupid!"

Everywhere I go I talk to Israelis. For the last 16 months since making Aliyah, I try to connect with real Israelis (that would be home-grown Sabras and people living here for more than 30 years) and ask them all the same question: ma karah (what happened)?
What happened in the last 30-something years since I was an American Jewish teenager living in the Ramat Eshkol neighborhood of Jerusalem with an Israeli family? What happened to the legendary Israeli spirit, the Israeli pride, the Israeli strength, the Israeli can-and-must-do attitude?
I ask everyone - haredi, hiloni, national religious, gay hairdressers, taxi cab and bus drivers, the clerk at the market, the vendors at the shuk, teachers, children...everyone who I can get to pay a moment's attention: I ask them - What happened to Israelis, MY Israelis? Why is everyone so defeated? I ask and ask and can't get a good answer, an answer that rings true.
Finally, a thoughtful young lady listened to my story about living here in the '70's and answered my question. "So, what happened here? Ma karah po?”
“It’s the degradation,” she said simply. A year’s worth of other answers – long and short, bitter and philosophical, resigned and resentful – rolled away in a moment and I saw it all clearly. It’s the degradation, stupid! Israelis have been systematically degraded from without AND from within, and it all started with Oslo and the "presumptive close," that we would give away land for "peace," that we came upon our land in some illegitimate way, that we owed the court of world opinion some sort of answer and worse yet, some sort of compensation for our crimes. Little by little, day by day, editorial by editorial, speech by speech by left-leaning self-hating Jews inside and outside The Land, politician by politician who have raped this country over and over's the degradation, stupid.
Degredation leads to depression, a sense of hopelessness, the "ma la'asot" ("what can you do?") attitude that you find everywhere. We sit and watch it all happen to us, and say, "ma la'asot," becoming victims of our own listlessness and overwhelming exhaustion.
How can a degraded people fight? How can a degraded people re-discover their strength and self-respect? How can a degraded people rise up against the elements within our own society bent on our own self-destruction???
First things first - Come out of denial!!! As HaShem led us out of "de Nile" (ha), may He also wake us up and lead us out of the denial we are living in - and once denial has been overcome, one must have a new reality to attach one's self to. How about trying this one on for size - this is OUR LAND, anyone who dosen't like it can leave now, and anyone who lives here who works to undermine the Land and the People of Israel is a traitor and should be treated like one - from the Prime Minister to the garbage collector and everyone in-between. Screw the court of world opinion and the horse it rode in on.
Wake up my Israelis! Get up, stand up, stand up for your rights - as that other prophet, Bob Winston Marley sang - don't give up the fight! Remember WHO you are and what WE are and for the sake of everything we've all been through from the beginning until now - STOP ACCEPTING THE DEGRADATION!

Monday, July 14, 2008

This $52 BILLION Dollar Bud's for YOU, USA!

Et tu, Anheuser- Busch?

I suppose the next thing that goes to the highest foreign bidder is NASCAR.

(AP):The maker of the King of Beers has agreed to go to work for the Belgian brewer InBev SA.
Anheuser-Busch Cos. said early Monday it had agreed to a sweetened $52 billion takeover bid from InBev, creating the world's largest brewer and heading off what was shaping up as an acrimonious fight for the maker of Budweiser and Bud Light beers. Inbev brands include Stella Artois, Beck's and Bass.
The combined company will be called Anheuser-Busch InBev. As of the end of last week, InBev said it would be the world's third largest consumer products company by market capitalization after Procter & Gamble of the United States and Nestle SA of Switzerland.
The Anheuser-Busch board accepted the higher takeover offer Sunday night from Belgian-based InBev, according to a joint press release. The deal is expected to close by year-end.
"What consumers care is that their Bud will always be their Bud, and that's what we're committed to, not only the product, the quality, the beer ... but also the heritage, the breweries, who brews the beers, and everything that's connected to the breweries," InBev CEO Carlos Brito said in a media conference call.

Bad for the Jews!

No matter how you slice it, this is going to be bad for the Jews!
AP: This illustration provided by The New Yorker magazine, the cover of the July 21, 2008 issue by artist Barry Blitt, shows Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama dressed as a Muslim and his wife as a terrorist. The magazine says the cover is meant to satirize the use of scare tactics and misinformation in the presidential election to derail Obama.
Everybody knows the Jews control the New Yorker. Perhaps that is why both the Obama camp and the Palestinian Authority proudly announced today that Barak Obama will be meet with PA President Mahmoud Abbas in Ramallah on July 23rd.
Simulteniously, the Obama campaign backtracked on his statement about Jerusalem, as reported by Israel National News:
( Barack Obama, the Democratic party's nominee for U.S. President, retracted the statement he made at the AIPAC Convention in June, about the need for Jerusalem to remain Israel's undivided capital. Obama had already qualified the statement the day after he made it, but in a new CNN interview he effectively retracted it, blaming "poor phrasing" and careless syntax. Interviewer Fareed Zakaria asked: "One area where you're outside the international consensus -- and certainly, perhaps, some others -- is the statement you made in a recent speech supporting Jerusalem as the undivided capital of Israel. Now, why not support the Clinton plan, which envisions a divided Jerusalem, the Arab half being the capital of a Palestinian state, the Jewish half being the capital of the Jewish state?"
Obama replied: "You know, the truth is that this was an example where we had some poor phrasing in the speech. And we immediately tried to correct the interpretation that was given.
"The point we were simply making was, is that we don't want barbed wire running through Jerusalem, similar to the way it was prior to the '67 war, that it is possible for us to create a Jerusalem that is cohesive and coherent.
Sin of syntax"I was not trying to predetermine what are essentially final status issues. I think the Clinton formulation provides a starting point for discussions between the parties.
"And it is an example of us making sure that we are careful in terms of our syntax. But the intention was never to move away from that basic, core idea that they -- that those parties are going to have to negotiate these issues on their own, with the strong engagement of the United States.
"And if you look at the overall tenor of that speech and what I've said historically about this issue, you know, Israel has an interest not just in bunkering down. They've got to recognize that their long-term viability as a Jewish state is going to depend on their ability to create peace with their neighbors."

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Ahmadinejad's Penis Envy

Poor, poor Iranian President Ahmadinejad has so much latent anxiety about his apparently monumental masculine shortcomings that he has spent the last two days furiously firing his toy missles into the Persian Gulf in his own personal version of male penis envy. Wikipedia states: While not the same kind of penis envy as that typically referred to in psychoanalysis, the phrase "penis envy" or "small penis syndrome" is also sometimes used to describe the envy of a male over another male's penis. Although this subconscious or conscious envy may solely be based on the idea that a larger penis is universally more satisfying and appealing to a sexual partner, other implications arise from the fact that a large penis has been seen in many cultures as a symbol of high masculinity, dominance and power. While this whole matter has probably always been a part of human psychology, recent developments have made the issue slightly more public in the western world."
Note to Iran - normally when a group of women watch a guy drive by in a hot red sports car we shake our head and say, poor guy. He must have a really tiny penis.
Et tu, Mahmoud?

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Tractor Terrorism in Jerusalem

In Jerusalem today a "Tractor Terrorist" hijacked one of the dozens of tractors used for the ongoing construction of the Light Rail and rampaged down Jaffa Street between the Central Bus Station and the Shuk, killing (as of this writing) 4, and wounding dozens more. A bus was overturned, several cars crushed, others lay smoking on their sides as over 50 ambulences rushed to the location, helicopters hovered overhead, swarms of journalists, photographers, and just regular Jerusalem folk like myself descended upon the scene.
In what has to be a kind of tragic karmic irony, The Jerusalem Post reports: An off-duty soldier took the gun from an elite policeman at the scene and shot the terrorist dead. The soldier, Moshe Klessner, 18, is the brother-in-law of IDF officer David Shapira, who killed the terrorist in the Mercaz Harav Yeshiva attack on March 6. ...Police added that the terrorist, Jabr Duwait, a 32-year-old father of two from Jebl Mukaber, was carrying an Israeli identity card. The Mercaz Harav attacker was from the very same east Jerusalem town.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

How Our "Big Kahunas" Dress For Success

Yesterday at The Temple Institute's headquarters in the Old City of Jerusalem, history was made as the first set of "Bigdai Kahuna" (Priestly Garments) was unveiled to the public and press. Modeling the garments was
The Temple Institute's own haberdasher (מלביש) Aviad Jeruffi, pictured here measuring Rabbi Nachman Kahane, who was officially the first Cohen to be measured for his own custom-made set of Priestly Garments. Also pictured is Rabbi Yisrael Ariel, Chief Rabbi of The Temple Institute, measuring Rabbi Shlomo Riskin, Chief Rabbi of Ephrat and #2 Cohen to be measured for his own set "bigdai Kahuna." As Rabbi Kahane joked during the unveiling, "It IS a big day for the Cohanim" (play on words in Hebrew / English as "bigdai" ("bigdai Kahuna") means "clothing"). Rabbi Ariel measured Rabbi Riskin's head with the comment, "Azeh Rosh Gadol!" and everyone laughed in agreement, including Rabbi Riskin. Also present and pictured above was Rabbi Moshe Azman, Chief Rabbi of the Ukraine, whose presence represented the anonymous donor from Ukraine whose generosity helped finance the creation of the incredibly fine hand-made materials whose fabric makes up the beautiful garments, to be worn by all Cohenim (the Priests of the Jewish People) when the Holy Temple is rebuilt (may it be speedily and in our day). In the mean time, Cohens world-wide can order their very own hand-made customized Priestly Garments and keep them ready for the day - which G_d willing will be at hand soon - by contacting Yehuda Glick, Director of the Temple Institute in Jerusalem at (052) 476-7495 (from within Israel) or from the U.S. at 972+524767495.